Trust me, if you were an ambassador to China and only knew Greek, you’d have a lot of difficulties! Similarly, communicating with your child will be 100 times easier once you understand how to convert your words into his “native” language: Toddler-ese.
Toddler-ese came to me by chance. I dealt with 20 tantrums a day from children who detested going to the doctor, as do most paediatricians. Then I saw that if I simply mirrored a portion of the child’s sad sentiments back to them, I could generally turn their tears to laughter (or at the very least collaboration) in minutes…or less!
Talking to Toddlers: A Beginner’s Guide:
- Your toddler’s “native tongue” is Toddler-ese.
- Toddlers are like uncivilised or barbaric tiny people…
- Consider them “cave kids.” Do you recall the Tarzan movies? and the straightforward wording used? “Come on, Cheetah!” “No, Jane, you are not allowed to eat.” You get my idea.
- With three simple steps: brief phrases, repetition, and echoing a bit of your child’s feelings, you can translate anything into Toddler-ese (using your tone of voice and gestures).
- The more Toddler-ese you practise, the better you will become.
- Surprisingly, when our small children are joyful, we all naturally utilise Toddler-ese with them. When they’re upset, however, we often forget to utilise it.
How to Build a Relationship with Your Toddler
Toddler-ese is more magical than magic, and it’s nothing short of incredible—real it’s and it works! It gives youngsters a sense of being cared for and understood. When you combine Toddler-ese with the Fast-Food Rule, you can prevent up to 90% of tantrums and settle more than 50% of meltdowns that do occur…in seconds!
Does it seem too good to be true? It isn’t, thankfully. In fact, most parents who use Toddler-ese notice significant changes in their child’s behaviour in just a few days and report feeling more connected to their child.
How to Communicate with Toddlers: It’s as simple as 1, 2, 3.
Toddler-ese translates adult words into basic messages that our cave children can understand…
even in the midst of a frenzy With just three easy strategies, you can convert whatever you wish to say into Toddler-speak:
- Short phrases are used.
- Repetition.
- Mirroring—to some extent—your child’s emotions (with your tone of voice and gestures).
Step 1: Short phrases are used
The use of very short phrases is the first premise of Toddler-ese. The simpler your phrases are, the less upset your child will be.
Start with 1-2 word phrases for small children or very furious older children (using just the key words). For example, for a 2-year-old upset:
Instead of:
- “I understand how angry you are.”
- “Did that doggie make you nervous?”
- “Do you truly want that candy?”
Say:
- “You’re mad! Mad! Mad!”
- “Scared! Scared! Big doggie!”
- “Candy! Candy! You want it…now!”
These “bite-size” chunks of jargon are perfect for a stressed-out child’s brain. (Of course, once your child recovers, you’ll be able to expand your words again.)
Step 2: When it comes to communicating with toddlers, repetition is crucial.
Short phrases are just as vital as repetition. When your toddler is in an emotional tangle, words fly by too quickly for her to process. And the more agitated she becomes, the less receptive she appears. That’s why, only to get your furious toddler’s attention, you’ll have to repeat the same short phrases 3-8 times. Then repeat it a few times to persuade her that you truly understand.
Does this appear to be excessive? It’s not the case. Many parents, in fact, fail to soothe their child simply because they believe that addressing their child’s feelings once is sufficient. When emotions slam the door to your child’s mind, though, you’ll have to “knock” several times for her to hear you and “allow you in.”
Here’s how to go about it: Imagine it’s raining outside, and your 2-year-old Sam is itching to play in the dirt. He’s sobbing at the door, unable to grasp the handle. As a result, you:
- Bring yourself down to his level and gesture to the door.
- “You want outside!” It’s time to go outside! ‘Go…go…go!’ says Sammy.
Repeat your words a couple more times if he continues to fuss. He’ll soon turn to face you, as if to say, Huh? Are you speaking to me?
Stretch your sentences back to normal as he stops crying: “’Outside now!’ says Sammy. You have a strong desire to get out! ‘Let’s go play, Mommy!’ you say.
If you’ve correctly read his emotions, he’ll turn to you, look you in the eyes, and think to himself, “Bingo!” That’s exactly what I’m looking for. Mom understands!
As he relaxes, it’s your job to deliver a message (explanation, distraction, etc.): “But no, love, noooo.” It’s pouring outside! Raining! Wet…yucky! Come along with me! Let’s have a pillow fight, shall we? Come have some fun! It’s a blast!”
Step 3: Use Your Tone and Gestures to Reflect a Little of Your Toddler’s Intensity
The first two elements of Toddler-ese are really useful, but the third is the key to success! Your child may not understand all of your words, but she is an expert at understanding your voice and facial expressions (a right-brain specialty). That’s why, by mimicking your child’s emotions with your tone of voice, facial expression, and body language, you’ll be able to connect with her sweet spot precisely!
- Voice. Use a little more oomph than usual, but at a lesser volume than your youngster. Reflect a third of the anxiety, frustration, and other emotions you detect in her tone of voice. (If your youngster is shy or sensitive, you may need to utilise a lower level of intensity.) As she begins to relax, gradually return your voice to normal.
- Face. Make an effort to be expressive. Raise your brows, open your eyes, wrinkle your brow, and purse your lips.
- Body language is an important aspect of communication. Make a lot of hand movements. Wag your finger, wave your hands, point, shrug, and stomp your feet.
Talking to your toddler takes practise, just like everything else.
Getting the hang of Toddler-ese can take some time. So, if you’re new to speaking and still feel self-conscious, don’t worry––just take it gently at first. It’s best to use it first for the minor ups and downs. Once you’ve gotten used to it, progressively increase the amount of tumultuous upsets you use it for. I am confident that you will like utilising it.
FAQ
How do you talk to your toddler?
Tips to get toddlers talking
1. Reading aloud and sharing stories is a great way to spend time together…
2. Sing songs or recite nursery rhymes with your youngster.
3. Use words to express what’s going on when you’re playing with your child, such as ‘Push the ball back to Mummy’ and ‘You got the ball!’ …
4. Using words and objects, give your child options.How do you stimulate a toddler to talk?
You may help your kid improve his or her communication abilities by doing the following:
1. Solicit assistance from your child. Request that he place his cup on the table or bring you his shoe, for example.
2. Teach your child simple nursery rhymes and songs. Give your child a book to read.
3. Encourage your child to communicate with his or her peers and family.
4. Participate in pretend play with your kid.How do I communicate with my 2 year old child?
Here are some ideas to assist your kid develop his or her communication skills:
1. Talk to your child about his or her day and what he or she plans to accomplish tomorrow.
2. Make-believe games are fun to play.
3. Read favourite books over and over again with your child, encouraging him or her to participate in with language he or she understands.What is toddler ese?
Your toddler’s “native tongue” is Toddler-ese. With three simple steps: brief phrases, repetition, and echoing a bit of your child’s feelings, you can translate anything into Toddler-ese (using your tone of voice and gestures). The more Toddler-ese you practise, the better you will become.
