One of my favourite techniques to encourage positive attitude in your child is through gossip. Unlike traditional toddler discipline, this method is designed to encourage healthy toddler behaviour so you can prevent misbehaviour before it occurs.

Gossiping to Encourage Positive Behavior

In this scenario, gossiping is speaking things out loud near your child so that he hears them. It works so effectively because we all (kids and adults) are more likely to believe anything we overhear than something we are told explicitly. Your compliments will be five times more effective if you use gossip. (It also increases the effect of your critique by five times.)

For example, if a friend says, “You look wonderful,” you might ignore it as a friendly compliment. However, if you happen to overhear her saying this to someone else, you’ll undoubtedly smile and remember it. (It wasn’t stated to “butter you up,” after all; you overheard it.)

Not only do we believe things we overhear, but we believe them considerably more when they are whispered—almost as if they are a secret. If your child overhears you saying something kind about them, it might establish a wonderful example for them to follow, making them want to be praised for their good behaviour again.

When Should You Begin Gossiping Around Your Child in Order to Encourage Good Behavior?

Toddlers between the ages of 15 and 18 months are the ideal individuals for gossiping. That’s when they realise people whisper when they’re talking something particularly meaningful.

Allow your youngster to hear you praise them in a loud whisper to begin.

Louise brought her 3-year-old daughter to see doctor for a sore throat one day. Doctor used gossip instead of fighting Turner to open his mouth. Doctor loudly whispered, leaning towards Louise, “I like it very much as Turner opens his mouth and shows me his big lion teeth.” I clasped my palm next to my mouth as I spoke, as if I were revealing a secret (I kept my fingers spread a bit to let him see my open mouth, so he knew what I wanted him to do). Turner instantly opened wide when I switched on my light a few seconds later…as if by magic!

Whisper some praise about her to someone else while your toddler is close. You can whisper it to anyone, including a doll or someone you’re pretending to be on the phone with. When you’re doing this, don’t wink or glance at your child. When he thinks you don’t want to be overheard, he will gossip.

“Psst…hey, Mr. Birdie!” you say to the birds outside, cupping your hand alongside your mouth in a loud whisper. Lauren finished all of her peas! Yes, each and every one!” Then, as if nothing had happened, return your attention to your child and overwhelm her with praise. “Way to go, Lauren!” Even if your child doesn’t understand all you say, her value will be enhanced by your appreciating tone of voice!

If your child leans in to hear what you’re saying, speak more quietly…as if you’re sharing a tasty secret. If you’re talking to an older child, mumble parts of the words so he doesn’t hear them completely. This gives the impression that you don’t want to be overheard. If he exclaims happily, “I hear you!” say, “Oh, it’s nothing.” I’m just having a conversation with Mr. Birdie.”

Mention the compliment to someone else later. Your child will be happy and say to themselves, “Wow, this had to be real because I’ve been hearing it a lot lately.”

When Mom is pregnant, this gossip approach can also be used to encourage positive toddler behaviour. It encourages children to recognise the unique position they play as a big sibling, which can assist to alleviate envy. (For additional information on how to help a toddler adjust to a new sibling, click here.) It also lays the framework for them to provide a great example for their younger brother or sister. Who stated “gossip” was a negative term?


  1. How can I improve my toddler’s behavior?

    Practicing Self-Control
    1. Talk about how you’re feeling and how you’re going to deal with it.
    2. Provide your youngster with strategies for dealing with powerful emotions.
    3. Demonstrate empathy for your youngster….
    4. To make waiting simpler for your youngster, give him or her a visual help.
    5. Allow your child to make decisions that are appropriate for her age.
    6. Find techniques to assist your child in “practising” self-control.

  2. How do I teach my child to gossip?

    Here are four strategies to educate your kids how to gossip in a positive way rather than a negative way.
    1 – Instruct students on the ripple effect. As we’ve seen, children begin chatting at a young age.
    2 – Teach your child to wonder aloud, “Why are you telling me this?”
    3 – Assist Your Child in Becoming a Gossip Buster.
    4 – Put what you teach into action.

  3. Why is my toddlers behavior so bad?

    Temper tantrums, emotional outbursts, and overall “bad” or unexpected conduct can be caused by a variety of factors. These can include biological factors such as hunger or exhaustion. They can also be emotional, such as an inability to cope with or describe their emotions.

  4. How can children avoid being called a gossip monger?

    Then offer things like collaborating on a charity initiative, joining a sports team, or even starting a Minecraft club. “A natural strategy to discourage gossip behaviour is to help your child and her friends discover other exciting things to do,” says Dr. McDonald.